Larry’s Diary Week Forty Eight

Monday

At breakfast this morning Bozzie asked the Little Otter “What day is it?” Well I thought, I know these Coronavirus days all merge into one, but surely her knows it’s Monday. But that wasn’t what he was really asking as I realised when the Little Otter said “How many times have I got to tell you it’s Windrush day”. Bozzie muttered a bit about being up early changing baby Wilfs nappy and giving him a bottle. Then he said “We have so many days now Grenfell day, Juneteenth, Stephen Lawrence day, Father’s Day, Mother’s Day, the Queens Birthday, the Battle of the Boyne. Is it any wonder I have to be sure as someone is going to get upset if I get it wrong”. I wonder if we are now going to have a Black Lives Matter day and a Reading Stabbing Day. It was so much easier when we only had a few Bank Holidays and National Saints days to worry about.

While on the topic of the Reading stabbings I wondered why at first it was a Terrorist attack and the Police after having raided the man’s accommodation and blowing their way in announced that it ‘definitely’ wasn’t a Terrorist attack and the man had been arrested for Murder. Then yesterday his criminal record started to emerge, not the worst bits but minor bits and it was obviously being pushed to make it look like he was a misunderstood Libyan asylum seeker. Next it emerged that he was on the security services radar having been reported for suggesting he wanted to go and fight in Syria but they had found hard evidence. Then it emerged that he had been out of prison for less than a fortnight having been released only seven months into a twenty four month sentence. Finally the Police de-arrested him for Murder and re-arrested him on Terrorist charges. As the Police now have 14 days to bring him before the court I doubt we will hear much more for a while.

I heard a strange story of going ons in Haringey Council where the ruling Labour Party have postponed the “Annual Meeting”, what other councils call their “Annual General Meeting”, for a year. It seems that while blaming this on “Coronavirus” the real reason may well be because of internal unrest in the Labour Party. It all goes back a few year’s to when Steptoe’s Momentum, the party within a party, organised against a number of the sitting councillors whom they didn’t consider left enough. They succeeded in getting a Corbynite council elected and then Joseph Ejiofor was appointed as Labour leader. Since then there have been a number of problems. He has sacked numerous members of his cabinet, including one twice after fellow councillors re-elected her to the cabinet. There is a major row going on over the councils housing policy and since the General Election and the downfall of Steptoe a number of the Corbynite councillors have been reconsidering their political positions. Ejiofors worry seems to be that if the meeting is held he will be replaced as leader so an inner cabal of the party has taken the decision to postpone for a year and this has infuriated even more Labour Councillors. I will have to keep an eye on events.

The Coronavirus numbers are way down again today with only 15 deaths and under 1000 positive tests. The lowest numbers on a Monday for months. 2 weeks ago 1 in 400 were believed to have the virus today it gone to 1 in 1700. The other news today was that the most Vulnerable people who have been shielding will be eased out of the programme from early July providing the numbers continue to improve.

I read with interest that Airlines are slowly putting more planes back into the air. Before the virus struck just over 20,150 passenger aircraft were in regular use. At the virus peak 13,963 of these were in storage. Last week this had dropped to 10,454 meaning that for the first time in months more planes (11,466) were active than in store. Business and Holiday travel in Britain is beginning to start up again, but very slowly, the main increase is in Asia, Australasia where the virus hit first. In Africa and South America the worst is still to come.

I hadn’t realised it until today as to just why Bozzie was so anxious to get rid of the top civil servant Sir Simon McDonald. The excuse given was that with the bid Foreign Office, DifD merger a new head the FCO civil service was thought to be timely. Then I read that Sir Simon was the person who allowed the BBC cameras in to film the “Inside the Foreign Office” 2018 programme that made fun of Bozzie. Bozzie has been taking his time, but revenge is a dish best serve cold.

I know that many of my readers love Talking Pictures TV but I was surprised to hear that it is based on one man’s collection of old British Black and White films. The owner approached several satellite TV channels to see if they wanted to air his material but was told that they didn’t air Black and White films after 16:00 hrs, so he decided to go it alone. Well not really alone, the company employs two people him and his daughter and their office is in there garden shed. During lockdown their viewing figures have leapt and on one occasion they peaked at over 3,000,000 viewers. Not bad for a two person company.

Tuesday

Morning all. I think I am getting obsessed with the weather. I get an urge to watch the forecast on the TV so that I can work out if I can get a nap on the windowsill. Today looks good, but according to that Shuffledknackers chap it might be a bit too hot for me for the few days after that. Talking of Shuffledknackers, have you noticed how much he needs a Haircut, almost as much as Bozzie.

Bozzie has been practicing again at Breakfast. He is making another announcement in the commons at lunchtime. I am embargoed on telling you what he has been practicing saying, but I can tell you it involves a lot of arm waving and he will be wearing his new smart suit. He looked at me very sternly and said “look here Larry, it’s no Felix Chicken for you if my speech leaks”. Does he know I am writing a diary? Is he a contributor to GP under a nom de plume? Who could he be?

I had a chuckle when that plane towing a banner saying “White Lives Matter Burnley” flew over their match last night. The BLM lot have called it out as racist and the Police even have got involved. Why? Are they saying that White Lives Don’t Matter. I wonder what laws they broke, maybe some obscure air law. Will the FA be investigating how Manchester City and Burnley allowed it to happen. Why didn’t they have fighter planes up above the stadium to shoot down the intruder?

The more that emerges of the Reading Park knife attack (I was going to write stabbing but they had their throats slashed) the more the MSM struggle with its reporting. Gone is the fact that he was an asylum seeker. No one talks about his full criminal record, MI5’s interest or that he was stopped by the Police the day before the incident. The big miss though is that it is Taboo to mention his religion and it’s beliefs on Gay men. The fact that the three men who were murdered were gay only emerged obtusely. First there was a mention that one man’s husband had died several years ago. Next they mentioned that they were all “friends”. Finally it’s hinted they all drank in the same gay pub. Why not come out and admit that the probability is that this was a deliberate attack on gay men by a member of the religion of peace.

Bozzie up in Parliament this afternoon has been making his announcement on Coronavirus things like social distancing which he says can be reduced to what he calls 1 metre plus from 4th July. It seems a bit odd just what the new rules will and won’t allow. For example churches can open for services and weddings can take place but only 30 can attend and no singing is allowed. That doesn’t worry me as my singing has been called caterwauling. Pubs, restaurants and hairdressers can open, but gyms, swimming pools, nightclubs and nail bars can’t. Cinemas, Museums and Galleries can open Theatres can’t, they can however open if there is no audience, for live streaming only.

Some things are interesting and I’m sure a bit more details as how they will work exactly will be explained before 4th July when they become active. For example although hotels, guest houses, bed and breakfast, campsites, caravan parks and rented holiday homes will be able to open I expect there will be lots of new rules to go along with them. Lots more outdoor places can open can open and I’m sure all the little kids will be delighted that outdoor playgrounds and equipment is back on the agenda but disappointed that indoor soft play areas aren’t. I bet a lot of councils will have to get their mowers out as I hear they haven’t been cutting the grass around the swings and slides.

Another Tuesday jump in the number of Covid-19 deaths. Today the total number leapt by 280 which seems to be bad until you learn that 109 of them were catching up from April. Today’s real number was 171 which compares well with the previous two Tuesdays of 233 and 286.

Wee Krankie has abandoned plans for getting children back to school using the so called “blended learning” scheme favoured by Labour. She has had to admit that the part time at school, part time at home scheme just wasn’t practical and Scottishland children will now be going back to school after their summer holidays. This brings them into line with England. I expect Keir Stoma will quietly drop his pressure for “blended learning” in England by not just mentioning it again. A bit of a loss for both of them.

Today’s is the last of the daily Coronavirus Press Conferences as the Virus is shrinking. The aim is to only hold a conference when there is something specific to announce. However, the daily slides that are presented at the conference will still be made available every day. I won’t be sorry to see Ministers no longer moaning that they have been scheduled to do a conference.

Wednesday

I think baby Wilf is a bit like me, he doesn’t like very hot weather. He was crying loudly this morning and the Little Otter said it was because he was too hot and put a big fan on. It made it cooler, but ruffled my fur a bit. Bozzie had his new suit on again, since he has come back from his spell in hospital the Little Otter has had him on a diet and he has lost weight. The Little Otter nagged him that the old suit made him look like he was wearing a sack, so he had to get a new one to keep the peace.

The Imperial College Coronavirus Vaccine is starting to be tested in humans today. I understand that it is a “novel” vaccine, does that mean it is made from old books? A man on the TV says that if it works you only need a tiny amount of it for it to work. He said that you would get 2,000,000 doses from two litres. He then went on to explain than was the same size as one of those big bottles of Coca Cola you get from the supermarket. If he said that in America their would be thousands of people injecting Coca Cola and blaming the GKP.

The other vaccine, the one from AstraZenaca, has been injected into thousands of people in Brazil as there is much more chance of people being exposed to the virus there. I also read that they have been injecting it into pigs to see if they developed immunity and it seems they do. That’s good news if all the humans die of Covid-19 at least the pigs will be OK, sounds like Animal Farm. AstraZeneca have signed another production contract this time with a company in Scottishland. AZ are throwing everything at this vaccine they must be pretty sure that it’s going to work, either that or the Government is paying all the costs.

After yesterday’s announcement that hotels, bed and breakfasts, campsites, etc.were allowed to reopen from July it seems there has been a mad rush for reservations. Booking sites say that a reservation is being made every 12 seconds and that the peak periods are filling up fast. People are obviously eager for their summer holidays and are still worried about going abroad. I only hope that we have a decent summer for weather as it would showcase English holiday resorts and set them up for years to come.

Do you remember the Pakistani Airlines plane that crashed into homes in the outskirts of Karachi a month or so ago in which 97 died? The preliminary report, out today, says there was absolutely nothing wrong with the aeroplane but lays the blame for the crash firmly on the pilots who it says were distracted by a covid-19 discussion. The Plane approached the airport 3 times higher than normal and ignored the Air Traffic Control warnings. The plane lowered its landing gear 16km out from the runway and then raised it again 8km out. ATC told them to abandon the approach but the pilot said they were OK and carried on. The plane then scraped its engines on the runway and tried to undertake a go around but the engines had been damaged and the plane crashed into a housing estate a mile from the end of the runway. A Pakistan Minister said that up to 50% of pilots in Pakistan are believed to have forged licenses and the investigation is still looking into these pilots paperwork. I have decided I will never fly PIA, mind I don’t think there is much chance of me flying anyway.

I hear that the Government is to introduce a bill in the House of Commons tomorrow to allow pubs and restaurants a lot more freedoms when they reopen. The aim is to allow many of them to make more use of outdoor space much like the continental cafe culture. Tables will be allowed on pavements and car parks. I can think of a few pubs and restaurants that could use pavement space for more tables but I don’t no of any in central London with their own Car Parks. I hope they will allow them to have giant umbrellas or the likes for when we get the typical UK summer of three hot days and a thunderstorm. I also worry about what blocking the pavement will mean to blind people.

Thursday

Wow it’s hot today! I must say I didn’t feel too good last night, I think I got a bit over hot and I nearly drunk the No 10 birdbath dry! I see the gardener bloke has filled it up again this morning but it’s that smelly tap water, I wish it was from the water butt but at least I can have a drink. Bozzie went out jogging with the Mutt again and came back all hot and sweaty. The Little Otter told him to get a cold shower, I think it was connected to his run but I might be wrong. By the way did you see the picture in yesterday’s paper of the Mutt taking Bozzie for a walk in Lambeth Palace Gardens, Bozzie looked a little hot and bothered.

I see that last night there was a disturbance in of all places Brixton. The Police had been warned of a planned “Block Party” and issued a control order for the surrounding area. But this made no difference to the peaceful local residents who turned out mob handed, one with a 3ft sword, and drove the riot Police out of the area injuring 22 and damaging several Police Cars and the the cars of several residents. Isn’t it odd that this is not the first time there has been rioting in the area, strangely it always seems to occur during a warm spell. I wonder what the common factor was for those rioting as there have been riots in Brixton in 1981, 1985, 1995 and 2011.

Sometimes I wish I didn’t live in London. I would love to see the giant container ship that is due dock in Southampton early tomorrow morning. The HMM Oslo will be the biggest ship ever to dock in Southampton and is physically the biggest container ship in the world although some of its sister ships can carry a few more containers. At 399.9 metres long and 61.5 metres wide it is 90 metres longer than London’s tallest building, the Shard, is high. It can carry 23,820 x 20 foot containers. The ship has come from South Korea, China, Singapore and Rotterdam and will not be staying in Southampton very long as it is due to sail for Le Harve at 21:00 hrs on Saturday. It will be taking on exports for the Far East and will be going back to South Korea via Singapore.

Looks like some good news is on the way for you sun lovers. From listening at the closed doors I think that the negotiations for travel corridors are nearly finished and an announcement could come this weekend. I think I have heard that initially the list will include France, Italy, Spain, Greece, Belgium, Germany, Norway, the Netherlands, Turkey and Finland. If you go to any of them the idea is that you won’t have to quarantine for 14 days on return. The big holiday exception is Portugal, that is because there is currently an outbreak in Lisbon. Once this is in hand I expect it to join the list. In the meantime you can still go to Portugal you will just have to go into Quarantine when you return.

Oh dear, Wrong Daily has been sacked as Shadow Education Secretary by Keir Stoma for

re-tweeting an anti-Semitic tweet. How she ever got a job as Education Shadow is anyone’s guess. I suspect Stoma felt obligated to give her a job as a beaten competitor for the Labour Leadership. The Corbynite is more suited to a position on the back benches along with the uphill Gardiner. The hunt for a replacement can hardly throw up someone worse.

The small cruise ship RCGS Resolute, that sunk a Venezuelan patrol boat, has been bought at auction for just $870,000 despite being value at $35 million. The auction of the assets of the ships owners was to try to recover the $4 million the company owes. The new owner have got a bargain.

Lots of complaints from Bournemouth today as thousands of people turned up on the hottest day of the year so far and crowded on the beach. The council are not happy and have declared an emergency. The car parks filled up early and it seems some people had the audacity to camp on the beach overnight. You would think that the council would have been delighted to have throngs of visitors but lots of attractions are not opening till July so they can’t fleece the tourists, only the takeaways and the ice cream parlours will be rubbing their hands together.

Friday

Well today it wasn’t Wilf that woke me in the night but the rumble of distant thunder. The storm never quite made it here, but it is pleasantly cooler today. Anyway breakfast was as usual, the Humans, the radio, the Papers and me having to warn off the Mutt who having scoffed his food was sniffing round mine. He has learnt that my claws are a pretty good weapon. Bozzie was happy that for once all the headlines were not about him with lots going with Stoma and his sacking of Wrong Daily. Bozzie was rubbing his hands together at the prospect of a left wing vs right wing war in the Labour Party. Stoma is said to be meeting with a number of prominent Lefties today but he can hardly be seen to back down over the sacking it would make his position as leader impossible. I do hope a nice left right split develops.

Bozzie and Richie Nik-Nak have been chatting about a back-up to the American GPS system now that the E.U. doesn’t want us in the Galileo satellite navigation system despite our putting in loads of money and writing most of the software. The problem is that if the American system were to fail it would leave us without a back up for navigation. Not only that just think of all the things that use it everyday without you even thinking about it from your phone to all those apps that ask if they can use your location and the app that shows you where the man delivering you parcel is. They talked about building our own £4 billion system before Coronavirus, but money is a bit tight at the minute. The plan seems to now be to put £500 million into buying a 20% stake in the British One Web system who plan to have 48,000 mini satellites. They already have launched 74 and are well on the way to another 650. A swarm of mini satellites are much more difficult to take out in a war and many can be launched together to save money. The One Web system also plans to use the Satellites to distribute fast, cheap Broadband so if it works it could be a win win situation.

I see there was more trouble in London last night. This time it was another street party but in Notting Hill. Once again it was necessary for the Police to go in heavy in the early hours after being attacked by the so called partiers. Is it any wonder that the middle classes are rushing to move out of London. Who can blame them with riots every night, marches every weekend, ER closing down the streets on a regular basis, expensive travel, hugely expensive housing and a midget mayor it seems a sensible thing to do.

It looks like things may be about to change in the world of Railway Franchises. Currently, although not actually, the franchises are effectively suspended, because of Coronavirus, and are being operated by the Government under Emergency Measures Agreements. This situation is due to end on September 20th when the Franchisees are due to take back over. However Transport Secretary Grant Shatts has been dropping some heavy hints that nothing is going to be the same as before and that we are likely to be moving to a new kind of railway. The Williams review into the Railways is due to be published soon and is suspected to recommend a return to an integrated system, much like the old Network Rail. I’m not sure how this is going to be a lot different from the Nationalised idea that Labour wanted at the last election, unless the franchisees stay but are effectively responsible to and run by the New Network Rail.

AstraZenaca are still expanding the potential reach of the Oxford Vaccine they are testing. Now it’s reported that they have reached an agreement, but not yet signed a contract, with the Japanese Pharmaceutical Company Daiichi Sankyo Biotech. Under the agreement Daiichi would receive bulk shipments of the Vaccine from AZ for them to turn into doses and distribute in Japan. It seems to me that AstraZenaca are really putting a huge amount of faith in the Oxford Vaccine or the result of the testing are extremely good.

What is it with asylum seekers stabbing people? Today someone in a hotel housing asylum Seekers during lockdown stabbed 5 people in the hotel and one policeman. Of course Wee Krankie wasted no time in announcing that it wasn’t a Terrorist Attack. I wish I knew how see worked that one out as the perpetrator was shoot dead by the Scottishland Police. I doubt we will every truly know.

Saturday

I’m not sure what is going on with the weather, first it’s too hot, then it’s too windy, then it’s grey and overcast now it’s wet and miserable. When will I ever be able to reclaim my position on the windowsill. I’ll just have to find a comfy chair to sleep on today, it shouldn’t be too hard as it’s Saturday and not so many staff are in.

I read that the Irish are to get a new Teashop today. Verruca is standing down and someone called Micheál Martin is taking over (Micheál is pronounced to rhyme with Town Hall). This is typically Irish, the election was months ago and they have spent all this time arguing about a coalition and who should be Teashop. It has finally been agreed that Martin who is leader of the largest party is going to be in-charge for 2 years and the Verruca who’s party is only 3rd largest will take over. The 4th largest party, the Greens, will join the coalition and the 2nd largest Sinn Féin will be the opposition. I would have thought that the problems that Ireland has with Coronavirus and Brexit would have been enough without this dogs dinner of an arrangement.

Keir Stoma hasn’t wasted much time in announcing his replacement for Wrong Daily despite all the left wingers in the party begging him to reconsider her sacking. I have heard a lot of them on the radio saying that what she did was not really anti-Semitic. But I thought the reason she was sacked was not because she re-tweeted the message but because she refused to delete the retweet when asked. Anyway the new Shadow Education Minister is Kate Green who I have never heard of either.

Bozzie has repeated his threat to walk away from the E.U. on Australian Terms at the end of the Transition Period unless the E.U. make some concessions. At least that is what he told the Polish Prime Minister today. Bozzie’s Office said that he was willing to negotiate seriously next week but the E.U. had to reciprocate.

Tour Operators have said that they have had a huge increase in foreign holiday bookings since the rumours of travel corridors broke earlier in the week. TUI say that bookings leapt by 50% and lastminute.com have leapt by 80%. However, Jet2 today announced that this summer they will only be flying to Coronavirus free places and have cancelled thousand of bookings particularly to the Greek Islands. Very strange just when corridors are about to be agreed.

If it isn’t BLM protestors out making a fuss, it’s Liverpool football supporters. Last night thousand of them where out celebrating and social distancing went out of the window. To many loud cheers a fire work was fired on to a a balcony of the Liver Building setting it alight. Fortunately the fire brigade where on hand to put it out before any serious damage was done to the iconic building.

An Astronaut on the space station has dropped his mirror while out on a space walk and seen it drift off into outer space at what was said to be 1 metre per second.That’s about 2 1/4 miles per hour or walking speed, so it’s going to take a long time to get anywhere. At that rate it would take about 11.5 years to get to the Moon. But what I want to know is why a Male Astronaut wants to take a mirror on a space walk? If it where a female Astronaut I could understand an urge to fix her hair before meeting an Alien, but this was a man. Next they will be telling us he has lost his man bag!

That’s it for another week. WG has been pushing me to get my copy in to him quickly as he says he’s trying to write something new for GP. I hope it is worth reading as it sounds like a major effort from the poor old man. Nighty Night.
 

© WorthingGooner 2020
 

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