This is a question asked by all foreigners, who look on in horror as we binge-drink our way through the week, stumbling through the streets in various states of inebriation. As though I were talking to someone from Chyyyna, I’ll try to give an answer.
The English drink so much because we are unhappy. Possibly the last time the English were happy was in the 1990s, and even then, every bit of happiness was opposed by the State, which passed draconian law after draconian law to illegalise the venues and events in which working-class communities could meet. The English people drink so much because it is, still, one of the cheapest ways of being happy. The popular perception of England as a wealthy country is flawed. We may still have the sixth biggest GDP in the world, but that wealth is held by a tiny percentage of the population. The workers of England have a lower standard of living than their equivalents in some of the poorest countries in Eastern Europe—lower, for example, than Poland and Romania. On top of that, we have by far the lowest investment in state services of any country in Europe.
Under 45 years of neoliberalism, the traditional forms of English culture have been systematically dismantled, and with the theatre, the music hall, the cinema, the club and the football ground now too expensive for a working-class wage, the pub is the last place of entertainment. It’s for this reason that the pub — even with a pint in London having long passed the £8 mark, smoking banned and cigarettes costing over £20 a packet — is under further attack by the potential introduction of new legislation in which working-class speech is to be monitored and punished by what are, in effect, pub/banter police. As a result of all this, around 300 pubs are closing every year in England, and under the progressive Islamification of the UK, towns and boroughs under Sharia councils will undoubtedly be declared dry in the future, with drinkers in public fined as smokers in public spaces currently are. If you don’t think this is possible, you’re not paying attention to what’s happening to this country.
More generally, and more than any other country in Europe, the English are subjected, at every instant of their lives, to a relentless campaign of surveillance, censorship, threats, advertising, propaganda and denigration teaching us to hate ourselves and our culture. It is a measure of how successful and internalised this campaign of hate has been that the English now willingly pay for and carry with them at all times the medium through which this campaign is waged against them, this being, of course, the smartphone, which is the primary weapon of this psychological warfare. For all these reasons, the English drink as much as we do because, in those few hours of oblivion, we can still believe that we form an ethnic community, that our neighbours are not informing on us to the police, and that, as Englishman, we share something in common that no government can take away, even that of Commissar Andeh BodyBags Burnham. And if we drink enough, we can even believe that the people taking over our country like us, that the cultures replacing our own wish us well, that the government shipping them in with our taxes has our best interests at heart, and that if they don’t, we can vote someone in who does.
The English drink as much as we do because we don’t want to face up to the reality of our lives: that we are being replaced in our own country, and that our children will live as second-class citizens in the land our forefathers laid down their lives to defend. The English drink as much as we do, therefore, so as to avoid the truth we refuse to see: that unless we form ourselves into an army of national defence and repel the invaders and those in league with them, we will lose our country — not for a decade or a generation but forever. When the English drink, we are the bravest people on earth. But when sober, we are cowards who have allowed our country to be conquered without firing a shot in our defence by an enemy we have paid to conquer us.
Finally, the English drink as much as we do because the state wants us drunk, wants us fighting each other over a pint, wants to take our unhappiness and the rebellion that might come out of it and drown it in a glass, wants us to give our government another reason to take away even more of our freedoms. For all these reasons and many more, the English drink as much as we do. But when we wake up from our drunken stupor, we’re going to wish — too late — that we had put that Dutch courage to better use……..
© DJM 2026
