Nouilles a la Cnut

As many of you know, I am something of a foodologist, responsible for such delights as this delicious meatloaf:

Local delicacy – “Which retard bought the really fatty mince and not enough bloody soffrito for this meatloaf”

and other such culinary masterpieces for example this 1″ thick sourdough failure that worked nicely as a re-creation of Pratchett’s Dwarven Battle Bread.

Dwarven Battle Bread

However, in such straightened times and with a second lockdown approaching as our headless “government” tries to cover its own failings via a Lockdown Sequel, here is a recipe for a quick and nutritious[1] repast. The noodles keep for nearly forever, the seasoning just sits in your cupboard and the franks can be frozen.

This is the lunchtime of filth.


1 pack of Chicken Super Noodles, any other flavour simply does not work.
5-6 thick slices (3-4 mm) of strong Cheddar
Knorr Aromatic Seasoning
3-4 Herta Frankfurters


First, get the kettle on. Cut out and bash 3-4 franks from the packet. Bashing a frozen pack against the corner of the worktop (if sturdy enough) will break off the desired number of frankies. Place in a microwave on full power for about 2 minutes until defrosted and slightly cooked.

Set them aside to cool.

Prepare the noodles with about 275ml of boiling water instead of 300ml, adding the flavouring sachet before pouring the water. Microwave for 4 minutes.
In the meantime, cut your cheese slices.

Haaaaalfwaaay to Paradiiiiise

Dice your frankies into 1/2 inch slices.
Stir the noodles and add a good shake of Aromatic Seasoning. Stir once more, then add the frankie chunks and overlay the slices of cheese.

Microwave for another 2 minutes and leave until cool enough to eat.

Enjoy your Posh PNAAW.

Et Voila!

[1] ish.

© El Cnutador 2020

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