Larry’s Diary, Week Three Hundred And Forty-Four

Monday

Good morning, my happy readers. Brighter this morning and quite a decent day out there. It looks like it’s going to be a decent week here in Downing Street, as Mascara Man is off to New York tomorrow for the UN General Assembly and a meeting with The Donald. Talk about ‘Never here Kier’, MM is trying to outdo him, what with tours of the nation and No 10 North Fridays.

Rumour in the street over the weekend that Mascara Man is thinking about an early General Election because he needs a political mandate of his own. He feels that he needs £14 billion of additional capital gains tax take to balance the books, and he is hog-tied by the mandate that Liebore was elected under. Then it emerged this morning that we are currently spending £12 billion a year on Universal Credit for migrants. We dare not cut this payment because of the left of his party. What a mess this country is in.

More good news for Rolls-Royce over the weekend, when the government confirmed that Rolls-Royce Submarines will be building the nuclear reactors for all the AUKUS submarines. Admittedly, it would have been a bit of a surprise if they hadn’t got the order. But these are to be a new reactor design, the PWR3+.

Our first nuclear submarine was powered by an American Westinghouse reactor, but since 1965 all Royal Navy nuclear submarines have been powered by Rolls-Royce manufactured reactors. Firstly, it was the PWR1, with various different cores, and now it is the more powerful PWR2 that powers the Vanguard Class Trident submarines and the Astute Class submarines, the last of which, HMS Achilles, is still under construction.

The PWR3 has been developed for the Dreadnought Class Trident submarines and is based on an American design, but anglicised. It is said to be much safer than the PWR2, is sealed for its 30-year life and does not need to be refuelled. The PWR3+ is Rolls-Royce’s latest development and is said to be so safe that it can continue running in port, eliminating the need for shore power.

Kimi Bad Enoch has noticed that the removal of VAT refunds to overseas visitors has caused them to spend 8% less in the U.K., despite the same numbers visiting. She says that a future Tory Government under her would reinstate the VAT concession. This is a bit of irony, as she was a member of the government that removed the concession, claiming it would be tax neutral. Now that it has been shown to be tax-costing, she wants to reverse the system. As the Tories are unlikely to form a Government for a long time, what Bad Enoch says is irrelevant.

Last Monday there was a huge fire on the new Cruise Pier at Whittier, Alaska. At the time, there were two ships tied up at the pier, the cruise ship Norwegian Jade and an empty and unmanned tour boat, Klondike Express. The fire spread to the tour boat, but the crew of the Norwegian Jade were quick enough to move the ship away from the $80 million pier undamaged.

The fire department arrived very quickly but discovered there was not a single working fire hydrant on the pier, and they had to set up a shuttle using fire engines to move 100,000 gallons of water from the nearest working hydrant to the pier. I now hear that the pier has been destroyed despite the fire brigade’s best efforts. Who would allow an $80 million development without a single fire hydrant? I don’t think that would get past Building Regulations in the U.K.

I hear there is another one of those Air Traffic Control problems affecting flights over the north of England, Northern Ireland, and Scotland this morning. Apparently, the bug, now fixed, was at the NATS centre at Prestwick near Glasgow and affected dozens of flights. It looks like this incident is not as bad as the last one, but two incidents in less than a month is rather disappointing. I think the man who runs NATS and is paid a small fortune is unlikely to resign, even if he should.

I have to wonder what has been going on in Moscow over the weekend, where the Mayor said that 1,961 drones attacking the city had all been successfully shot down, with the debris from one drone causing a grass fire. The Russian news agency, Tass, also reported over 1,961 drones, but over the whole of Russia and Crimea, so both can’t be right. However, Ukraine says they launched around 400 drones and missiles into Russia. Despite Moscow being protected by five air defence rings and what the Mayor said, there has been video coming out of Moscow of massive fires at the giant Moscow oil refinery and a 1,000,000 sq m business park. Someone is telling porkies again.

Tuesday

Hi folks, sunny but a bit autumnal when I popped out this morning, but I understand that, according to the weather lady, it is going to be warm and sunny today. The financial numbers are out this morning, and it is a bit of a disaster for Mascara Man. In August, we borrowed a mere £18.3 billion to pay for what we spent over our income. This is the second-highest ever borrowing in August, £2.9 billion up on August last year. It is well above the City forecast of £15.6 billion and £3.5 billion higher than expected by the OBR. This Government goes from bad to worse.

This morning, Mascara Man has let it be known that he is sending an RAF tanker aircraft and ground crew to Saudi Arabia. Supposedly, we are going to refuel Saudi aircraft that are defending their oil infrastructure against the Houthis’ drone and rocket attacks. So, the idea is that we are only officially helping with defence, but if a refuelled jet shot off and dropped a few bombs on the Houthi drone launch sites, are we helping to defend Saudi infrastructure, helping to attack the Houthis and opening the war to them attacking our shipping?

The Cunard liner QM2 has had problems on its latest cruise during its return to New York, where it arrived several hours late. People watching the ship on a tracker noticed that on numerous occasions it had to reduce its speed from 17 knots right down to 2 knots. At first, the reason was unknown, but I now hear that the ship’s captain made a ship-wide announcement saying that the problem was a fishing net that had become entangled around one of the ship’s Azipod propulsion and steering pods. I suspect that as soon as it was docked in New York, divers would be down there cutting the net away and making sure everything was working as it should be.

In Germany, the weekend local elections were another disaster for the governing party, the CDU. Friedrich Merz described the election in Sunday’s Mecklenburg-Western Pomerania election as a “disaster”. The CDU party managed only 4.9% of the vote, meaning they fell below the 5% of the vote needed to be represented in the proportional representation state parliament. The CDU also suffered in Berlin, where they lost 9.5% compared with the last election three years ago. The CDU has massive problems, as does the national PM, Merz, who is hanging on by his fingertips.

I hear that they have a problem at and around Frankfurt Airport. It seems that in recent days, three people have died from malaria, two were workers at the airport and one lived close by. In addition, another five airport workers were diagnosed as suffering from malaria. The strange thing is that none of these people had been out of the country, let alone to a malaria-infected area. The theory is that some mosquitoes carrying malaria have smuggled themselves in on a plane. I remember the days when, before take-off in some countries, cabin crew passed through the cabin with bug-killing sprays. Perhaps we need to restart that process.

Zack Polanski has a major problem in his Holborn and St Pancras parliamentary campaign. There is a clash between the date of the by-election and his Green Party Annual Conference. Many in the party are not happy, as they would rather be getting drunk at conference than being out on the London streets knocking on doors. Where will Zack spend his time, at conference or in the constituency?

The Manchester United Muslim Supporters Club has demanded the resignation from the Manure board of Jim Ratcliffe because he said the country was on the slide because of immigration into the country. Ratcliffe is Britain’s wealthiest man and has moved his residence to Monaco to save tax. It seems the move will save him £4 billion this year in tax. I can’t think why he shouldn’t have moved.

Wednesday

Good morning all, a chilly start to the day again, but the sun is up and it is forecast to be another nice day in a Mascara Man-less No. 10. I had the misfortune of seeing him on the telly box with The Donald yesterday and, my, did he look unimpressive. There he was, scrunched up in his seat, like a naughty boy in the headmaster’s study. Trump told him he did not support Chagos, and like a good little chap, MM said he would review the deal. I do hope Chagos is finally dead.

I have been wondering for a long time just how many illegal immigrants come into the country every day by means other than small boats. Recently, I have seen reports of them arriving in the backs of lorries, on buses crossing the Channel on ferries, and the huge number that come in on student visas and then simply disappear to work in the black economy. The other thing I have been thinking about is how many arrive on small boats but are not picked up by the authorities. Of course, the Government says it doesn’t happen, but I have been hearing stories about small boats landing all along the south coast under the cover of darkness. On Monday, an editor from GB News witnessed seven arriving on a beach near Folkestone in a small boat. Of course, he called the police, but by the time they arrived, the several had run off. Is this the thin end of the wedge?

Following the publication of Earl Spencer’s biography of his sister, Princess Diana, I hear Piers Morgan is to sue over a story in the book. Spencer claims that, as editor of the Daily Mirror, Morgan authorised the publication of pictures of Diana taken at a gym. Morgan totally denies this, saying that at the time the pictures were published, he was writing a show business column on the Sun and that two years later he became editor of the Sun. Morgan wants the libel removed from the book. This would involve the book being withdrawn and reprinted without the offending tale. There is also a call for a substantial donation to charity. On the face of it, Spencer is on a sticky wicket.

I hear that the immigrant charity Care4Calais has been caught telling people about to get on small boats in Calais how to lie to the U.K. authorities and claim they are children, under 18. I understand that, as a registered charity, they received a large donation from Essex Council. No, not the current Reform council, it was the previous Tory one. This cat wonders if Care4Calais is being political and should have its charity status removed.

It has emerged that one in five adults, aged from 18 to 64, that’s 7.3 million, are claiming Universal Credit. That is reckoned to add around £1,000 to their income and is not means-tested. But UC is not just a top-up benefit, it is paid for all sorts of things, and millions on it are unemployed. No wonder, as a nation, we are now over £3 trillion in debt.

The Liebore party has been paying companies to book stands at its conference next week by advertising it as the biggest ever Liebore Conference, with 20,000 attendees, well up on last year. But they have sold nothing like as many tickets to the Conference as they expected. In fact, I hear that they have stopped talking about 20,000 attendees and pulled the advertising that features it. So how many do they now expect? The latest number I am hearing is that they are hoping to get 15,000, but I somehow expect it will be less.

At the Limp Dump party conference this week, they voted for trans people to use the toilets and changing rooms for the sex they identify as. This is in total defiance of the High Court ruling that says your sex is what you were born with. So, the Limp Dumps are aligned with the Greens and all the weirdos and won’t be getting my support.

Thursday

It’s a good morning to you, my friends. There is rather a lot of very high cloud this morning, so the sun is very watery here in London and hasn’t warmed the streets yet, as my mother cat used to say. Mascara Man has come up with a new idea he thinks will be a crowd-pleaser and cost the Government nothing. Well, I have news for him, his plan to return drinking in league football grounds to how it was in the 1980s and allow drinking while in view of the pitch is going to affect the pubs around the stadiums. They are going to lose drinkers and go bust, so it will lead to a lower tax take.

Mascara Man gave a speech to the UN yesterday and, my, was it boring and embarrassing. I nearly fell asleep. I feel very sorry for all the national delegates. But it was interesting that he blamed Russia for just about every ill that has befallen this country since World War 2. He wants to set up a new anti-Russian propaganda unit. I expect it will be located in Manchester next door to Number 10 North.

Earl Spencer must be worried, as he has apologised to Piers Morgan for his libel, but as I write this, he and his publisher, Penguin Books, have not withdrawn the book from sale, as Morgan has demanded. As I understand it, every book that is sold increases the likely damages that Morgan could be awarded. I am delighted to see that Morgan wants any damages to be paid to the King’s charity. I wonder what is happening in the offices of Penguin. Is there a panic about what this is likely to cost, recalling the book, pulping it, reprinting it and paying damages? Or do their lawyers think they can defend the libel, or maybe get Charles Spencer to foot the bill? I bet their contract is being gone through with a fine-tooth comb.

Another boatload of illegal immigrants arrived late on Tuesday evening, and there are a couple of intriguing stories attached. The boat set off from Normandy and took some 38 hours to get here. That sounds like a replacement bus service. But it was escorted all the way to the middle of the Channel by the French Navy, where the 60 passengers were handed over to the RNLI.

Over in Gosport, the Government was setting up for the RNLI to land the immigrants. There were tents, coaches, ambulances and police all waiting. Then the locals turned out in their hundreds, and the decision was made to divert the 60 immigrants to Dover. All the police, empty coaches and ambulances raced off along the A27, under blue lights, to Dover.

I see Ineos has decided to mothball three chemical production plants in Hull, with the loss of 240 jobs. Ineos says that the simple reason is that the price of gas in the U.K. has made the plants uneconomical. They pointed out that gas is 12 times cheaper in the U.S. and eight times cheaper in China. Why is gas so much cheaper in the U.S.? The answer is simple, the U.S. has an ample supply from fracking, something we could be doing, but our governing politicians are scared to do.

An interesting little snippet of news reaches me from the Caribbean. For the first time in living memory, there have been no hurricanes in the Atlantic this summer. Normally, the peak hurricane season lasts from August to early October, during which, on average, over the last 112 years, there have been 14 named storms, 7 ordinary hurricanes, and 3 major hurricanes. This year so far, with only a couple of weeks of the hurricane season left, there have been 3 named storms, 0 ordinary hurricanes and 0 major hurricanes. What has happened? Is it climate change, or just a fluke, like in 1907 and 1914, the only years on record without a hurricane?

I read that the head office of the Guardian newspaper in King’s Cross has an infestation of bed bugs. A bit of the second floor was fumigated, but it seems to have been a failure, as the whole building is now affected. Following Covid, the Guardian has been trying to get its employees back to working full-time in the office, but has struggled to get many to work a minimum of 3 days a week. The bed bug problem has now ensured that employees have been told that they may work from home until the bed bugs have been eradicated.

Friday

Hi everyone, dry and sunny again this morning, and nice and warm in the sun. I rather like autumn while it’s still warm, the only problem is it makes me realise winter is coming. I was delighted to see that dopey Lisa Nandy has been squashed by the Government. While campaigning for Mascara Man, she told anyone who would listen that should MM put her back in the DCMS, she would be looking to have the National Lottery nationalised. She got her wish, and MM reappointed her as the Secretary of State for the DCMS. But it has been announced that the Government has no intention of nationalising the National Lottery. Stupid woman.

The BBC thinks it has come up with a wonderful idea to stop people dodging the TV Licence. They want to replace the Licence with an £11-a-month fee on the internet, thus catching all those who say they don’t watch live TV. With the Government’s plan to close down terrestrial TV, and the broadcasters’ plans to quit satellite TV in favour of internet-based TV, the BBC thinks it is on to a winner. But I can see it being labelled the ‘Internet Tax’, and the Government that brings it in will find it as unpopular as the Poll Tax.

Tony B Liar has stuck his nose into Government business once again and told Mascara Man he should commit to rejoining the EU within ten years. Well, this cat has not detected any great public demand to rejoin. Of course, there are a few people in favour of rejoining, but they are mainly Remain dinosaurs, left over from the referendum. They are mainly of the political left, and their voices are disproportionately heard in the left-wing media.

The number of illegals crossing the Channel in inflatable boats seems to have jumped in recent days, with over 781 coming in on Wednesday. The Government insists that, in conjunction with the Frogs, the numbers this year are down. Others say it was due to two things, the weather has not been suitable for small boat crossings for much of the year, with strong winds blowing them back to France, and the numbers crossing the Mediterranean into Europe being down by 45%. Strangely, this is a similar percentage to the numbers crossing the Channel in small boats. So what has caused a rush of crossings in the last few days? Could it be that the Channel has been like a mill pond?

In September 2022, an Aeroflot flight from Geneva to Moscow was taxiing out to take off when Switzerland announced that they were following the EU and imposing sanctions that prevented Russian aircraft from taking off, landing or overflying the country. Consequently, the Airbus A321 returned to a stand, the passengers and crew were unloaded, and the plane has sat there untouched ever since. Apparently, even if the sanctions were called off tomorrow, its condition is so poor it could not fly without a massive amount of work, and its current ownership is in question. It is another one of those planes owned by an Irish leasing company that has gone bust and is subject to liquidation. I also hear that some cracks in the plane have appeared, the engines have been left open to the weather for the last two years, the food that was loaded for the flight was never unloaded and has rotted, and the plane has been infested by rats and flies. I wonder how much the plane is worth today.

Trump sanctions are beginning to hit the California wine-making industry. The problem is the Canadian public’s reaction to having sanctions slapped on Canadian exports to the US. One of the Canadian public’s reactions has been to stop buying imports from the USA, and this has hit alcohol sales, and wine sales particularly hard. Last year, US sales to Canada were down by 35% on the previous year and are not expected to improve this year.

Back last year, the Donald went on a visit to China, confident that he would land a 1,000-aircraft order for Boeing. However, it didn’t happen, and the best that came out of that trip was a Chinese ‘commitment’ to two hundred planes. A year later, the order has not been placed, and there is a Chinese state visit to the US. Once again, there is speculation of a big order for Boeing. Well, as I hear it, Boeing could get an order, but it is not very likely. Discussions on the 200-plane order are far from done, but it is just possible that an order for 50 to 100 Boeing aircraft could be signed.

Saturday

Morning, my friends. When I trudged down the garden, it was a bit overcast, but the sun is out now and quite warm. I do hope it lasts. A big announcement from Mascara Man late yesterday. There have been a lot of rumours about an early election, but MM decided to announce that he intended to go full term to 2029. Just how much he has been influenced by the 100, or more, Liebore MPs who are likely to lose their seats is the question. Mind you, if the circumstances are right, I think MM will go earlier.

Not one, not two, but three MRP polls were out this week. All have Liebore in a 1 or 2% lead, and the Tories & Reform tied behind. The breakdown of seats puts Liebore in the lead, but not with enough seats to form a majority government. They could only form a majority government if they went into a rainbow coalition with the Greens, the Limp Dumps and the SNP. What a truly awful prospect!

I see that a coroner has suggested that two police officers may have contributed to the death of a 91-year-old man. The bit of video from the woman officer involved is rather revealing. The two officers were called to a Folkestone care home by the staff because the man was ‘being disruptive’. The 91-year-old had only one leg, was in a wheelchair, had an infection and suffered from dementia. The video opens with the police entering the man’s room, where he is armed with a butter knife. The police demand he drops it on the floor, and the old man looks at them in total confusion. The male officer did most of the talking until, about a minute after arriving, the officer pepper-sprayed the man and then tried to knock the blunt butter knife out of his hand using his extended metal baton. One minute and 14 seconds later, the woman officer Tasered the old man, who was then arrested and transported to the police station. At the station, it was quickly realised the man was ill, and he was moved to hospital, where he died 20 days later. And the coroner thinks the two officers might have some responsibility.

Another new plan from Kimi Bad Enoch. This one is to stop the unemployment element of Universal Credit for some claimants after 6 months. The idea is that this would happen if the claimant hadn’t been paying in for very long, but would not affect the 59-year-old who was made redundant after working all his life since leaving school at 16. An interesting idea, but it might be a touch difficult to implement.

I read that there are numerous teams knocking on the door at Arsenal, trying to get the 16-year-old wonderkid, Max Dowman, on loan in the winter transfer window. Apparently, Luton made several approaches during the summer transfer window and were rebuffed. But now the suitors have turned to the coming January window, when Dowman will have just turned 17 and be able to sign a long-awaited professional contract with Arsenal. Suitors are said to include Premiership Coventry, Championship Portsmouth, Norwich City, Wolves and Burnley, as well as Celtic and Rangers from Scottishland. If Arsenal want to send him out on loan for a few months to gain regular first-team experience, they have lots of choice.

Officially, Boeing has 5 x 777-300ER on order, as well as 38 x 777F freighters. These are the old-model aircraft and not the new 777X models. However, the last 777-300ER built and delivered was in 2024, so somehow I suspect the order for 5 from Pakistan International Airways will be fulfilled. With orders for 657 x 777X models, including freighters, Boeing is itching to start full production but has to wait for certification, and that has still not been granted. Could the PIA order be switched to a 777-9? Well, that is a possibility, but with a large queue of customers, it might be a long wait. However, could PIA be convinced to take one of the thirty-odd 777-9s that Boeing has built on spec? If they were cheap enough and reworked to the certification standard, the answer is probably yes.

I read that a man was arrested back in July for having thousands of indecent pictures of children. He lived in a flat opposite a playground and took pictures of the children out of his window and then used AI to turn them into nude pictures. When he appeared in court, he was remanded on bail and sent back to the same flat. It’s almost as if he was being encouraged to commit the same offences again. I know we have a space problem in prison, but couldn’t he have been remanded to a bail hostel miles away?

That’s me done for the week. I don’t have a weather problem today, the sun is out, it’s not going to rain, so it’s the windowsill for me this afternoon. There is a minor problem, in that it has started getting dark earlier and we now have more hours of dark than light each day. I’m looking forward to a few MM-less days while he is in Liverpool, at Liebore’s annual bean feast. Chat to you all again next week.

 

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