Roger Ackroyd’s Question Time Review

Question Time 5th December 2019

Panel:

Richard Tice: (Tycoon)
Ian Blackford (Poltroon)
Annelise Dodds (Loon)
Ed Davey (Buffoon)
James Cleverly (Picayune)*

*(of little value or account)

Venue: Hull

Voted 67% to Leave. One of the highest Leave votes in the country. And now this evening it is blessed with three ardent Remainers (two of whom are Scottish), one Leaver and one “OK, I suppose I’ll have to go along with it”.

It is a great pity that Laura Pidcock, she of the clipped Beff-style language strangulation, was not available to be on the panel although initially listed. Never mind eh, we got the mad-haired, Marge look-a-like, Labour nutter instead. Oh frabjous joy. Let us remind ourselves that Dodds moved seamlessly from university studies into academia (Aston University – rated 95th out of 131 on student ranking) and after several attempts to get elected only finally made it into parliament in 2017 (Oxford, where else?) She has zero experience in the commerce but is the Shadow Treasury Minister and could be ensconced in power within 7 days. Let that sink in.

A lengthy stint of experiencing QT “live” and doing a review for each and every one (bar Flying Hippo’s much appreciated stand in one week) cuts through to the inevitable conclusion that you get what the BBC want you to see. There can be little doubt that the audiences have been carefully tweaked by the producers when you see Momentum members chosen by Bruce to give their opinion and panels have all – without exception (even though Bruce would huffily deny it) – been pro Remain. It is essentially a dishonest programme serving up what the BBC would argue is “the voice of the people” but is no such thing. It is the voice of the BBC bubble.

And so we were treated to the same vacuity of words emanating from the top table, delivered by third rate politicians and moderated – if that’s the correct word – by an overweening newsreader made good. Perhaps it’s just my age and perhaps I’ve been plugged in to the political mains for way too long – since the mid 60’s – but I only see liars, deceivers and here today, gone tomorrow chancers who get on the political conveyor belt not because they have anything concrete or constructive to give to the country but because there is a very lucrative gravy train stationed at Westminster. Even those who are temporary travellers between elections can still come away with financial padding that will prove a comfort for them in hard times. One has only to look at the likes of Pidcock, Rayner, Abbott, Long-Bailey, Lady Nugee, Dawn Butler…well, I could list the whole of the Labour Party front bench and you know that the dawning of the Age of Aquarius is not going to arrive for many a long year. These might be the Toc H lamps of the Labour Party but the dangerous ones, the spear chuckers are a-gathering in the rear ready to make their move once the Party is defeated at this next election.

One of the high points of the evening was seeing Ed Davey lose his rag with Richard Tice. He almost became incoherent with rage and his face contorted into one of the Muppet old men in the balcony. Tice, despite being interrupted by Davey, Dodds and, most annoyingly of all, by Bruce every time he was asked his opinion managed to hold his own although I fear BXP will come away from this election with zero seats. Cleverly did what he always does with Bruce when she butts in on his replies – he just ignores her and carries on. ‘Tis the only way to deal with her and I bet she hates it.
Blackford could bore for Scotland in any global boring contest and win it hands down. Blue suit, green tie? Och awae and shite, ye tubby poltroon. He gave the impression that all was fine and dandy in the Scottish kingdom, conveniently glossing over the fact that Glasgow has the biggest drug problem in the whole of Europe. And he managed to shoehorn “right wing terrorism” into a discussion on the London Bridge jihadi murders. I’ll have what he’s smoking.

Dodds must have come away from Hull aware now that the once faithful followers of the Labour Party, the working class plebs that propped the Party up for decades have now finally turned on the leaders and are prepared to ditch them. Corbyn is so toxic that not even the most died in the wool Northern follower can bring themselves to vote for the bastard. Her constituency is Oxford so she is reasonably safe, voted in as she will be by fellow academics, but the horny handed sons and daughters of the soil have turned their backs on Labour.

One other high point came when a member of the audience pointed out that followers of the Koran who read the words literally are going to lie to authorities and will happily kill the kuffar. Bloody hell, someone pointed out the bleedin’ obvious. Bruce went into total damage limitation control mode giving us the benefit of her expertise by saying that “millions and millions” of Muslims would disagree with that. Are you sure, Brucie babe, are you really sure? Or are you like the rest of the Establishment just burying your head in the sand and hoping it all goes away?

Well, dear Puffins, this will be my last QT review. There will be a QT next Friday but there will be nothing new to say. The Remainers will keep on bitching for evermore and we may get to see some semblance of Leave if Boris rallies enough troops. Or Corbyn will be in no.10 and we can all kiss our arses goodbye. It has been a privilege to bring you all the good, bad and ugly news from the various BBC outside broadcasts across the country over the last year or so but, as some of you have correctly surmised, there is only so much one can take before the brain atrophies. The imbalance of the panel, the mad ravings from the audience – only very occasionally producing a beacon of light – and the smarmy insouciance of Fiona Bruce pocketing more wad per programme than the average yearly income of a large proportion of the population finally broke this correspondent’s will to watch any more. It has been a good exercise in keeping one’s writing skills honed but there are more worthy subjects to be exercised and discussed than Question Time.