Literature
Presidents Club Pish
Ah reckon this Presudants Club pish has bin pure blown oot o’ aw pruporshun tae be honast wi yeez. Ah mind wan time the sarge took a load o’ us aw oot tae the curry [more…]
Satire
Arts
Lobsters Are Red, My Love
Jordan Peterson, Cathy Newman, it’s all been said hasn’t it? Well, apparently not, at 4.55am this morning a man crashed through my balcony window, he was dressed all in black, he wore a balaclava and [more…]
Arts
The Culture Wars: Meme Warfare Part 2
(This article and the previous part 1 are meant to be a bit of fun, and not to be taken seriously.) Part one looked at the need for memes and how they can be used [more…]
America
The Culture Wars: Meme Warfare Part 1
(This article and part 2 are meant to be a bit of fun, and not to be taken seriously.) Time for a bit of new year fun. In response to a previous article, someone asked [more…]
Arts
Zuckerberg is coming to town
(with apologies to John Frederick Coots and Haven Gillespie) You better watch out You better not cry You better not shitpost I’m telling you why Zuckerberg is coming to town Zuckerberg is coming to town [more…]
Literature
Ah feel pure sorry fer that wee Damian Green pr*ck
Ah wance got wheeked intae the inspectah’s oaffice fer a right f**kin’ hidin’ aboot whit some nosey wee IT c**t foond oan mah wurk computah. “None o’ yer crime reports are gettin saved intae the [more…]
Islam
Polis Sco’lan – Equalities visit to Strathbolloch Primary School
Mrs McRoper, class teacher, addresses the wide-eyed youngsters in the assembly hall. “…and as you all know, diversity is at the heart of all we do here at Strathbolloch Primary. Through our visits to Glasgow [more…]
Literature
Ah f**kin’ love a guid royal weddin
Ah remembah when Mike Tindall married that Zara burd in an’ we wiz all suconded tae Lothian an’ Bordahs for the day oan royal protection duties an’ aw that sort ae pish. It wiz well [more…]
Arts
Lloyds of London ‘My Word is my Bond’ A Page in the Diary
6am: Unleash bowel movement Purging yesterdays Petrol washed translucent flake cocaine, continental lager and sundry sweet meats. 6.10am: Get up. 6.11am: Think about Killing Myself. Shower/power wank while thinking of the Receptionists Feet , toe [more…]