Question Time 12th November 2026
The Panel:
Luke Pollard (Labour)
Ben Spencer (Conservative)
Layla Moran (LibDem)
Matt Goodwin (Reform UK)
Deborah Frances-White (Podcaster and comedian)
Venue: Exeter
You think the answer to life, the universe, and everything is 42. Wrong, it’s 44. How so? Read on!
Despite this week’s revelations surrounding the BBC’s Russel Brand and David Walliams, rather than pack the panel with a row of middle-aged white men, you might have expected La Bruce to be flanked by a gaggle of shrieking girlies. Perhaps, despite appearances, she is.
For Luke Pollard is the ‘openly gay’ Labour MP for Plymouth Sutton and Devonport who currently serves as Minister of State for Defence Readiness and Industry. The 46-year-old is the son of a submariner, and studied politics at the University of Exeter, where he rose to be President of the Students’ Union. Never having had a job beyond communications, lobbying and the political bubble, as well as being a player of the pink oboe, Luke also plays the homophobia card.
However, what was labelled as homophobic graffiti when his constituency office was vandalised, upon closer inspection, appears to contain more sinister wording: ‘Pedo’. Pictured here with his partner, Sydney, there does seem to be a Walliams-esque age difference. Comments attached to Luke’s Twitter posts include, ‘He looks a bit young for you’, ‘He looks 12 years old, you should be locked up’, and ‘dirty Labour nonce’. Again, fake media preferred to report this as ‘homophobia’ from ‘right-wing trolls’.
In the incestuous nature of Question Time, Luke and the next guest, Ben Spencer (Ben Spen?) were on the same QT panel as recently as February. Spencer is the Conservative MP for Runnymede and Weybridge and Shadow Minister for AI. The 44-year-old grammar school boy is a former NHS psychiatrist.
Puffin’s favourite, Layla Moron, is the Liberal Democrat MP for Oxford West and Abingdon. Another 44-year-old, the half-Palestinian pansexual is the present chair of the Health and Social Care Select Committee. Her father was an English diplomat; her grandfather (on the other side of the family) was a writer and one of the Jerusalem Jawhariyyahs. Ms Moran was educated at £64,000-per-annum Roedean and Imperial College and, prior to politics, taught maths and physics in the private sector at an international school in Brussels.
Her partner is Rosy Cobb, an ex-LibDem head of media sacked over a data-selling scandal covered up by fake emails threatening a journalist. Last year Layla and Rosy ‘announced the birth’ of their child, without saying which (or if either of them) actually gave birth. Just to be on the safe side, Layla took five months’ parliamentary parental leave – that you paid for.
In the incestuous nature of such things, Matt Goodwin last appeared on the programme this time last year (31st October, Bradford). At the time, he was billed as an author and academic but is now of Reform UK, having stood for the party in the interesting Gorton and Denton by-election won by banned-from-Israel Hannah Spencer. During the campaign, the St Albans-born candidate pretended to be northern because he’d been to uni in Manchester.
A political scientist known for his research into the extreme, far, ultra-hard right, the third 44-year-old is a graduate of Politics and Contemporary History from the University of Salford. Alongside an MA in Political Science from the University of Western Ontario, he holds a PhD from the University of Bath.
After completing his education, Matthew continued in education, holding positions at the University of Nottingham and the University of Kent. He is a senior visiting fellow at the ‘independent’ policy institute Chatham House. Matthew claims to advise governments and global organisations. However, a closer look suggests that he assumes they read his Substack. His current job title there is professor, analyst, public speaker, and commentator.
Deborah Frances-White says that as a young woman, she gave up all she knew and came to England on a one-way ticket to London. Not true. She came as a student to study English at Manchester Academy and Harris College, Oxford.
After graduation, she formed a media company, The Spontaneity Shop, with her husband, Southampton University graduate, actor and director, Tom Salinksy. The Spontaneity Shop provides corporate communications training to an astonishing list of blue chips, including TLAs such as BNP and NBA.
On the subject of reviews, Tom is the author of the play Kingmaker, which The List magazine noted as ‘sharply satirical ****’. No, no, no, no, no, not sharply satirical sh*t, sharply satirical, four stars.
Another play, called Brexit, awarded five stars and proclaimed ‘wonderful’ by The Scotsman, did even better. Or did it? Experts in communication, The Spontaneity Shop wallahs understand the utility of the selective quote. According to Brian Logan’s Guardian review,
‘Brexit goes nowhere fast; I saw it at a late-night performance where several people around me fell asleep. It’s not a good play. There’s no subtext, nothing going on at all besides the politics of which way the PM will swing. Why should we care? There are no new ideas about Brexit to recast into real life. Only a few of the jokes fly. The characters are self-seeking and unlikeable’
Oh.
Not to worry, perhaps a Messrs D & T Frances-White-Salinsky book might keep an audience awake? Their great work The Improv Handbook: The Ultimate Guide to Improvising in Comedy, Theatre, and Beyond sits in a somniferous 922,957th place on the Amazon Kindle bestsellers list, a yawning 767,294 places behind the Marquis de Sade’s 120 Days of Sodom. Maybe the pictures aren’t as good?
Last week, Puffins were enthralled to read of Worth-Saying County, Kentucky, which boasted a full roster of Republican victories despite the disappointing Trump midterms. This time, as Ms Frances-White-Salinsky hails from that Australian state, I must humbly inform readers of another Worth-Saying placename which lies in the Goondiwindi Region of Queensland.
According to the Temp, Worth-Saying, Queensland, was founded by my ancestor Edgar B. Worth-Saying, who arrived in Australia in 1850. Before you book a trip, keep in mind it’s not quite the centre of the universe and, at the time of writing, has a population only slightly more than that of a Question Time panel – i.e. nine. Puffins may prefer to holiday on Worth-Saying Street in Redcliffe, Queensland, which appears to be at the fashionable end of the Gold Coast’s Brisbane suburbs.
***
Beginning with the 99% of the time they fight amongst themselves instead of with us gentlemen, on this week’s Girl War, La Bruce was dressed as Ivanhoe in a green tunic over a long-sleeved white blouse. La Moron presented as a gay Ivanhoe in a pink top over a white top decorated in a pattern that the AI placed to a Southwestern Native American textile design, with Navajo-style geometric patterns. Is Moron guilty of cultural appropriation?
As for Layla’s jewellery, ‘this is a modern evil eye pendant (also known as a nazar, mati, or nazar boncuğu. The symbol is one of the world’s oldest protective amulets. It is based on the widespread folk belief that a jealous, envious, or overly admiring glance (the “evil eye”) can cause misfortune, illness, or bad luck. The eye-shaped charm is worn so that it ‘looks back’ at that negative energy and deflects or absorbs it before it can affect the wearer.’ If any Puffins felt queasy during tonight’s QT, now you know why.
Deborah was in manhate black with a white patterned collar, and oversized spectacles with frames similar to a 1950s Bakelite TV set.
Question One was about the BBC’s Russel Brand and the BBC’s David Walliams but managed to avoid mentioning the words ‘Brand’, ‘Walliams’ and ‘BBC’. Instead, the issue was framed within ‘abuse from men in power’. In a pre-rehearsed response, La Bruce turned to Deborah and asked of her experience. After plugging her podcast, the 58-year-old told of a famous man ‘motorboating’ her at a luvvie party.
What is that? It is, according to Deborah, when a man puts his head between a woman’s breasts and shakes it from side to side. Not quite as brave as a fifteen-year-old, Deborah wouldn’t say who. Surely that’s part of the problem? The product is the talent is the money, she continued on firmer ground. MeToo was a financial manoeuvre. As soon as Harvey Weinstein began costing more money than he made – out he went.
La Moron’s experience was of her Oxford constituency students being assaulted on campus. Protecting the reputation of the colleges was more important than protecting the victims. Gagging orders even banned the girls from going to their GPs or seeking psychological help. I wonder if the BBC uses gagging orders, legally known as NDAs or non-disclosure agreements. I’m certain they do.
Matthew said such things shouldn’t be party-political and preferred to wonder what should be done. He then moved the debate towards Reform UK’s higher ground by referencing Dame Louise Casey’s comments on the endemic nature of ‘grooming gangs’ – what might more accurately be called Asian Muslim rape gangs. Why haven’t the recommendations of various reports into such been followed?
In another carefully pre-rehearsed anticipation, Deborah raised Carol Vorderman’s (expensively augmented) head regarding ‘misogynistic’ comments made by Reform UK candidate Rob Kenyon during the Makerfield by-election. Deborah boasted of talking to a working-class man on the train. She claimed Reform were demonising ‘white and brown working-class men.’ Deborah, which would you prefer? To listen to a line about Carol Vorderman or to listen to a gang of Pakistanis while they…
Luke Pollard waffled. Matt Goodwin interrupted to ask about Maggie Oliver’s current attempt to challenge the government’s failure to implement recommendations made by the Independent Inquiry into Child Sexual Abuse. He added that the government’s inertia was to protect a certain type of Labour voter. Luke called Matt disgusting.
BenSpen wasn’t surprised. He played his psychiatry card and referenced women he’d talked to professionally. Twenty years ago, he thought he lived in an equal society, but after marrying and having children, he’d changed his mind. Is he henpecked? He kept calling men ‘fellas’. Deborah declared war on jokes. Apparently, they give moral authority to people who don’t echo everything Deborah wants to hear.
***
So much for that. On a sombre and relevant note, our unusual Debatatable Lands family name passes down through the Aborigines. Tragically, in 1991, four-year-old Evelyn, a faraway surnamesake, became one of the three victims of New South Wales’ still-unsolved Bowraville murders. Rest in peace, little distant cousin.
© Always Worth Saying 2026
The Goodnight Vienna Audio file
