Buried deep within the boiling depths of the earth’s core lies an element so rare and unstable that even if mining equipment capable of boring several thousand miles through the crust existed, the paltry gram [more…]
‘Good morning citizens, are you alive this morning?,’ came the feverish cry through Waltham’s cochlear receiver. One by one, the machines sputtered and grumbled to life. He felt the familiar vibrations intensify through the thin [more…]
Lord Cameron gazed giddily around his office, a look of wonder playing over his bubblegum pink visage. ‘I must say you have completely and utterly exceeded my expectations,’ he gushed. ‘If I was still in [more…]
The haggard, ruddy-faced detective sighed heavily as he groped across the table for the tape machine. He hit a button and began speaking in the weary, nicotine-and-vodka drenched tones of a man resigned to keeling [more…]
“Seriously Gidders, you should have seen the bloody state of it,” brayed Lord David Cameron, swinging his JM Weston brogues up onto the desk. “An absolute bloody farce. I was half expecting that Jeremy Beagle [more…]
F**k’s sake. Just back fae a dissaplinary heerin’ wi’ a pair ae complete f**kin’ c**ts frae tha profeshnul standards dapartment. It wis aboot f**kin’ hee haw an’ aw. A pure waste ae polis time ovah [more…]
Ah’m sick tae f**kin’ death ae hearin’ aboot aw thess Harry and Willyam pish. Ah’ve bin puttin’ up wi’ their s***e since they were weans an iss away’s thah same f**kin story. Ah mind wance [more…]
Ostensibly, it appeared to be a significant improvement on Larkin’s usual choice of hostelry. Outside, there was no gaggle of wizened, gimlet-eyed daytime drinkers sucking on Superkings and grunting incomprehensibly at one another. There was [more…]
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