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Stickypedia’s first line says it all really. Eric Stuart Joyce b. 1960 is a British politician, former military officer and convicted child sex offender. The only thing missing is his party affiliation and of course being in this series marks him firmly down as Labour.
He joined the Black Watch as a private in his teens, attended the University of Stirling, got a degree in Religious Studies and was then commissioned into the Royal Army Educational Corps. He resigned from the Army in 1999 with the rank of major after he had been found guilty of breaking Queens Regulations. There is nothing too juicy there, He made outspoken criticisms of the Army during the 1990s. He accused the Army of snobbery, public school bias, racism, sexism and discrimination. Nothing there you wouldn’t expect from a trainee gobshite Labour MP. He was given a choice, resign or be forcibly discharged.
He then worked as the Public Affairs Officer at the Campaign for Racial Equality. In 2000 he was elected as member for Falkirk West in a by election when Dennis Canavan resigned. He served as parliamentary aide to several MPs and then went on to various Secretary of State jobs.
The man was a real expenses trougher. In 2005-6 he was the top claimant in the House trousering nearly £175,000. The following year came his mea culpa where he said he was going to keep his expenses down. However in 2007-8 he topped it claiming over £187,000.
In 2010 he was arrested for failing to provide a breath test in Falkirk. For this he was fined £400 (put on expenses ?) and banned from driving for a year. He resigned his position as Norn Iron Minister and apologised.
In 2012 he went for the jackpot. He was arrested in the Palace of Westminster (aka the House of Shame) suspected of having committed assault. It was reported he had attacked six politicians including a Labour whip. It is alleged he had an altercation with some Tory MPs and then went berserk. He head butted and punched Tory Stuart Andrew having first hit the Assistant Labour whip Phil Wilson who was a trying to restrain him. He also assaulted two Tory councillors who were also attempting to restrain him. Two further Tory MPs were also involved. This all happened in the Strangers Bar. He was suspended from the Labour Party.
In 2013 he was again arrested after a disturbance at a Karaoke event in the sports and social bar at the House of Shame. He was seen fighting two police officers but oddly was not prosecuted.
Later in 2013 he was arrested at Edinburgh Airport where there was an altercation with airline staff about a mobile phone. Yet again he struggled with plod before being restrained and handcuffed.
In 2014 he was arrested after clashing with a teenager at a store in Camden. He was sentenced to 10 weeks in jail suspended for 2 years and ordered to attend a rehabilitation course.
In 2018 he was arrested and charged with having made an indecent image of a child, He had a 51 second Category A film that showed the sexual abuse of very young children. For this he kept his dangly bits, much to my disgust, but was sentenced to 8 months in jail suspended for 2 years plus 150 hours of community service.
A thoroughly unsavoury man with a violent temper who is also into child porn. He is supposed to be in a long term relationship with India Knight a journalist and author. In common with many lefties India Knight is very NHRN, she was christened Gisèle Aertsens. Those who know will recognise that as a Belgian name though her mother is an injun.
© well_chuffed 2026
