Mrs Paid’s farmhouse style low calorie Judas Cake

(Perfect for not- sharing)

Judas Was Paid, Going Postal

  • 8 Imperial ounces of pitted dates cut in half with scissors
  • 4 Imperial ounces of quartered walnuts
  • 7 Imperial ounces of self raising flour
  • 2 crumbled Weetabix
  • 3 eggs
  • 2 egg cups of water or cold tea
  • 1 teaspoon of bicarbonate of soda
  • 4 Imperial ounces of heavy brown sugar
  • 4 Imperial ounces of butter or (coughs whilst mumbling “Fecking cheapskate”) margarine
  • 1 small loaf tin
  • 1 oven

Place pitted dates into a small saucepan (un-pitted dates can be used if you wish to choke a guest). Cover with the water and bring to the boil slowly, turning off the heat once bubbling. Add the bicarbonate of soda and stir. Set aside to cool. I usually do this half an hour before.

Cream together the butter, sugar and eggs.

Add the flour and Weetabix to the mix, folding in gently and avoiding vigorous fist movements. (This will be hard for some).

Toss in your dates and slip in your nuts, folding gently till evenly distributed.

Turn into a lined or non-stick loaf tin and bake for 55 minutes at 180 degrees.

Judas Was Paid, Going Postal

I usually pick up my dates at Home Bargains. I get my nuts there quite often too. The cake will keep well for about a week but if you still have it after a week you are a tight arsed poofter.


© Mrs Judas was Paid 2018

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