Crossword No. 25

Richard Puller, Going Postal
© Richard Puller 2018

Today’s GP crossword is based on probably the most famous crossword of all time, first published in the Telegraph on January 13th 1942.

Letter writers had been complaining that the crossword had become too easy, so a challenge was issued for readers to come to the newspaper’s offices to compete for a £100 prize for the first person to finish it in under 12 minutes.

This was a cover for recruiters from military intelligence, who wanted to find people with a “sufficiently twisted brain” to work in Station X, the code name for Bletchley Park.

Five people managed to complete the challenge in the allotted time, and were duly invited to attend appointments with Colonel Nichols of the General Staff, sign the Official Secrets Act and help us win the Second World War.

Today’s GP crossword has the same frame and answers as in 1942, but the clues are now a mixture of news, politics and depravity from the twisted brain of yours truly.

Here are a few tips for the aspiring GP secret agents attempting today’s challenge.

Most clues involve anagrams, for example from last week:

19 Down: It was Diane Abbott’s greatest attribute (5) – the clue is “Diane Abbott’s greatest attribute”, the answer is a 5-letter anagram of “It was” – waist!

14 Across: She takes the piss out of Tory – glorious! (9) – The clue is “She takes the piss” the answer is a 9 letter anagram of glorious and T (for Tory) – urologist!

Labour leader is usually “L”, end of knob is “B”, Democrat is “D”, and similar for republican, true, false, left ,right, etc, and drug is usually “E” or “C”.

Sometimes there’s a more cryptic clue thrown in for good measure:

8 Down: It’s looking good for free sex on London landmark! (4,2,3,3) – the clue is “looking good” – free sex is “easy” then “on” and London landmark is “the eye” – so the answer is “easy on the eye”! Geddit?

Today you have more than 12 minutes for the competition and instead of £100, there’s a much more valuable prize on offer courtesy of the boss – your choice of a priceless Going Postal mug!

Good luck, and I hope that some of the clues and answers make you laugh as much as I do when I’m setting them!

1 Pouter on stage (6)1 Tiff pats official’s rod (8)
4 Quick way to circumcision? (5,3)2 Greasy Mediterranean: I have an evil loo (5,3)
9 Almost all privates have a neatly-trimmed bush (6)3 Richard Puller goes for dumpy ones (9)
10 Croatia accepts May’s leadership – creates a stink (8)5 Red ‘ho’ jostled by crowd (5)
12 Tommy Robinson’s ‘end’ is popular on social media (5)6 Order of merit (5)
13 Trump’s offer to the UK – lager date (5,4)7 Tory truce for guillotine motion (6)
15 Owen gets end away, give him credit (3)8 Kit inserts end of cock into teal (6)
16 Pretend there’s no ‘f’ in ‘effing’ (5)11 An aged manifesto (6)
17 Wanker-on-Trent? (6)14 Woman hidden in a dark room (3)
22 Stab for being white? (6)18 Finally throw earth on May’s grave (6)
24 G.I. (Sue) goes under cover (5)19 Foot’s on-sided leadership ended in light rain (5,4)
27 Brewery Bash ends in embers (3)20 Revealed: England stink, Lingard is piss (8)
28 Bint wrapped around erect tool (6,3)21 Hot and tensing for seven days (8)
31 IOU note attached to tip of knob (5)23 Harriet Harman’s favourite food? (3)
32 Tories ogled Sam (4,4)25 On balance, Conservative seals reshuffle (6)
33 Caring for ‘the runs’ (6)26 Paint me and Neal (6)
34 Gag user reclines (8)29 Kiss from “Iron Democrat” (5)
35 Hag lit the flames (6)30 It’s bio, e.g. snot (5)

First correct entry out of ‘the hat’ wins a GP mug. Email entries to me by 6.00 pm today subject ‘Crossword’.

Like this, but not this

Answers with next week’s crossword.

Solution to Crossword No. 24

6 UKIP 7 Referendum 11 Customs 12 Suspect 13 Solar 14 Urologist 15 Hostess 16 Entombs 18 Lawmakers 20 Eagle 22 Trivial 23 Toynbee 24 Put an end to 25 Etna

1 Quacks 2 Missiles 3 Jews 4 Pensioners 5 Imitates 8 Easy on the eye 9 Iceni 10 Poor relation 14 Upswelling 15 Hilltop 17 Megabyte 19 Waist 21 Enemas 23 Tutu

© Richard Puller 2018

Click here to download in pdf format: GP Crossword Number 25 & Answers to Number 24