I Popped over to Old Vi’s over the road this morning. Electric facking been cut off. Had to facking hook a cable up in the daft old sow’s kitchen. The Cunt only had a look on her boat all moosey faced like !!…I says Vi my gel, Vi I says, “if you cant do nothing for a neighbour in need we might as well go in live in the jungle Like that Black bird at number 22” I says..Facking cannibals ! I says. Dont bear thinking about. FGM I says!!, Whats all that about? .Cutting themselves Vi !. You tell me ! .I dont know. Facking Crying Shame if truth be Fackin told.
“one step up from the pg tips monkey” I says .lovely arse though Vi i says…phwooar!!.could do me a turn that black gel i says to Vi like. Right on my Fackin boat Race. Alien Face Hugger!. Get the juices flowing right enough. No need for your leccy then Vi!!. No Vienesse Whirls and Sterilised Tea .Fack that. Nah, good woman, that’s what I need. I says to Vi, I says “you want to make yourself a bit more presentable my Gel “. “Fuck this lymphoma” . In one ear out of the other. Know what I mean?.I said to Vi , “you probably haven’t had it since old Wilf left for Juno beach ” ave ya my gel!.
No laugh no smile no nothing!!. so I tanned The cunt across the jaw, just playful like. Keep me hand in.One For the road. Told her to put on those surgical stockings on to keep warm .Funny thing was though, when I saw ‘er all kitted out, crying and vunerable In those Facking Stockings.. Fuck me if i didnt have a babys arm on the go!!. well what could I do..
“Get your laughing gear round that my gel “I says. Blow me Fackin Trumpet My gel !. Bit of a Fackin Shame really .Shame for the old Girl. All on her own.There’s always some Cunt taking advantage. Dont bear thinking about. Old enough to be me grandmother. Shame . Could be my gran could be yours.Terrible. State of the nation since we joined that facking EU. Wheres the old bill when you need them?. I blame the Cut Backs and all that. Still, Lovely blow job. Especially with her fucking teeth knocked out .”Suckling Pig.”