date: Thur , Aug 18th , 2016
subject: ‘A’ Level Result day In the Evening Standard.
It is with Great anticipation that I look forward to reading your Publication this evening on my commute home. This is the day when Lives of Vibrant young Londoners originally from Tehran to Katowice to Hyderabad can Change forever, ‘A’ level result Day.
A Big Day In the Evening Standards Calendar, when its readers are treated with metronomic precision every year to front and centre page cliched pictures of ‘It ain’t half hot mum’ chorus lines of young girls in hijabs frozen in mid air and in Perpetuity, celebrating their results with gusto.
To keep this well seasoned event from going stale this year , It may be advantageous for the Editor to Discard your Stock in trade picture of former Eastern bloc sex workers from Ilford In Joyus Union with ex child soldiers from the Congo now suckling the teat in East Ham , Toasting their ‘A’ level D grade Successes in Umayyad Dynasty Islamic Textile Studies .
To Freshen things up This year, I suggest replacing the above with a 5 year old child genius from Xi’an now Living on a Barking Council estate, Receiving his Applied BioMarine Science studies ‘A’ grade, from the local Mayor. For added colour perhaps augmented with a Touching story of his illegal passage to England with his mother, secreted in a Patio heater.
Finally , I trust I can ensure you to Keep to your Modus Operandi again this year of never, ever acknowledging Emma From Hornchurch Or Tom From Emerson Park receiving their ‘A’ Level results.