With reference to my earlier posting of my Good Lady Jo’s, Pete Doherty Calais Collection bucket experience in The Hackney Empire Picture Palace.
I almost forgot in my Incandescent Fury, that My Wife took a ‘selfie ‘ as i believe it is known as in modern parlance, yesterday (Sunday!) afternoon, clearly in breech of the Treaty she has signed with the Good Lord on the Tabernacle.
Vigorous investigation unearthed that it was in aid of a Refugee charity for Doctor Livingstones expedition of French Equatorial Africa. Most Tiresome.
My Irritation was sated at the sight of her in full bloom, Bare of Make up she looked as if she had stepped straight from the pages of a Jane Austin novel. Pure of character, wholesome, an English rose, if you will.
My blood was up Now, and the sight of my Queen Anne table , its legs curved and and bare began to excite me in carnal ways..I was siezed by bestial urges in my parts!!… I quickly made haste to the medicinal cabinet to imbibe a potash of borax to sate my lust that befits the beasts in the field.
Unfortunately T’was too late. The intoxicating satanic Alchemy of Mr Peter Dohertys Calais Collection bucket, Dr Livingstones African Expedition And The top button of my Wifes starched blouse was now undone !!. I had to take remedial action. I immediately gave her a ‘Gentlemen Jim Corbett’ uppercutt, Whilst observing the Queensbury rules at all times. Eschewing her Kidneys and holding a sweeping pose over her prostrate figure, I read the lords 7th psalm verses 3 to 599995959 , in ancient Babylonian tongue from memory, casting the devil in all his manifestations from her harlot soul.
We were due to take in an informative and entertaining sojourn to see the Victorian beast oddity, John Merrick. Alas, once my Gander was up , I took my corrective ministrations a step to far, and killed her using a flat iron.
so the silly cow has fucked all that now.
Such were my palpitations at my Wifes unwise contribution to a Heathen Refugee Charity and the resulting brutal assault on her person , I had to be administered a potion of opium and laudanum( 2 parts arsenic) by my physician Doctor Pickwick.
She will pay most dearly for her tresspasses In Hell ,as i have no doubt, will pay dearly for mine Purifying the Streets of fallen angels as an instrument and conduit of the lord , Hacking and slicing away with my Surgical bone handle chiv.
Good day to you sir!